Italian Imperative: Commands, Informal and Polite

The Italian imperative is two systems wearing one name. The informal command, the one you use with a friend, is built from the present tense. The polite command, the one you use with a stranger, is borrowed from the subjunctive. They look different, they put pronouns in different places, and choosing the wrong one is not a grammar slip so much as a social one. Get the register right first and the forms follow.

The informal imperative: tu, noi, voi

Three persons, and two of them cost you nothing, because the noi and voi commands are just the present tense:

The only new form is tu with -are verbs, and it is the one to watch. The present says parli, you speak; the imperative says parla, speak! -Are verbs end in -a, and -ere and -ire verbs keep the -i of the present, so prendi and senti are both statement and command.

Aspetta! - Wait!

Vieni qui! - Come here!

Parla piano. - Speak slowly.

Andiamo! - Let's go!

Venite a cena! - Come to dinner! (to several people)

The noi form is Italian's let's, with no extra word needed. Andiamo is both we go and let's go, and the tone of voice does the rest.

The short forms

Five very common verbs have a short tu imperative, written with an apostrophe because a syllable has been cut off:

In speech the longer forms, identical to the present, are at least as common as the short ones: Stai zitto! and Sta' zitto! are both fine. Dire is the exception, with only di'. The short forms matter more than their frequency suggests, because they are what pronouns attach to, as you will see below.

Three more verbs are irregular in a way you cannot guess: essere gives sii, avere gives abbi, and sapere gives sappi. They are rare in everyday speech except in fixed phrases: Sii gentile, be kind; Abbi coraggio, have courage; Sappi che..., know that...

The polite imperative: Lei

When you address someone formally with Lei, the command is the present subjunctive. For the regular verbs that means the vowels swap: -are verbs take -i, -ere and -ire verbs take -a.

Look at the first two rows and the trap is obvious: parli is the polite command and also the informal present, you speak. English speakers who have just learned that -are verbs make tu commands in -a then meet parli as a command and think it is a mistake. It is not; it is a different register.

You will hear the polite forms constantly from anyone serving you:

Mi dica. - How can I help? (literally tell me)

Venga, prego. - Come in, please.

Faccia pure. - Go ahead.

Senta, scusi... - Excuse me... (to get a stranger's attention)

The formal plural, Loro, also uses the subjunctive (parlino), but it has almost disappeared from ordinary speech. Addressing a group, even politely, Italians now use the voi form: Venite pure.

The negative: non plus the infinitive

For every person except tu, a negative command is simply non in front of the ordinary imperative: Non parli (Lei), Non andiamo (let's not go), Non venite (voi).

For tu, Italian does something different. It uses non plus the infinitive:

Non parlare! - Don't talk!

Non aspettare. - Don't wait.

Non dimenticare. - Don't forget.

Non parla is a statement, he doesn't speak or you don't speak to someone you address as Lei, and it is the most common imperative mistake English speakers make, because it is exactly what the positive form leads you to expect. Memorise Non parlare as the model and let every negative tu command copy it.

Where the pronouns go

With the informal imperative, object pronouns attach to the end of the verb and become one word:

Guardami! - Look at me!

Chiamami domani. - Call me tomorrow.

Prendi la macchina. Prendila! - Take the car. Take it!

With the five short forms, the first consonant of the pronoun doubles. This is not optional, and it is one of the most characteristic sounds of spoken Italian:

Dimmi la verità. - Tell me the truth.

Dammi la chiave. - Give me the key.

Fammi vedere. - Let me see.

Vattene! - Go away!

The one pronoun that never doubles is gli: digli, tell him.

With the polite Lei form, the pronoun does the opposite. It goes in front as a separate word, exactly as it would with an ordinary verb: Mi dica, Mi scusi, Lo faccia. So tell me is dimmi to a friend and mi dica to a stranger, and the difference in word order is as much a marker of register as the difference in ending.

With the negative tu command, the pronoun can go either side. Non farlo and Non lo fare both mean don't do it, and both are correct. The same goes for the phrase you will need most:

Non ti preoccupare. / Non preoccuparti. - Don't worry.

Imperatives that stopped being commands

Several informal imperatives have worn down into conversation markers, and you will hear them far more often than any real order:

Guarda, non lo so is look, I don't know, not an instruction to look at anything. Dai, andiamo! is come on, let's go. Most of these have a polite version too, Senta, Guardi, Scusi, Tenga, and using the right one is the easiest way to sound as if you know which register you are in.

Softening a command: pure, dai and per favore

English speakers are trained to wrap every instruction in a question, could you possibly, and then find Italian abrupt. Italian softens its commands differently: it keeps the imperative and adds a small word that changes its temperature.

Pure after an imperative turns an order into permission. Parla is speak; Parla pure is go ahead, say it. Faccia pure is what a waiter says when you ask whether you can take a chair. Dai in front adds encouragement, come on, and per favore does what please does in English:

Parla pure. - Go ahead, say it.

Dai, vieni con noi! - Come on, come with us!

Aspetta un attimo, per favore. - Wait a moment, please.

None of these makes the verb any less of a command. They change the relationship around it, which is what English does with a question, only more briefly.

Instructions that use the infinitive

Written instructions aimed at nobody in particular, on signs, doors and in recipes, often skip the imperative altogether and use the plain infinitive. A notice on a door says chiudere la porta, close the door, and a recipe tells you to mettere the pasta in the water. It is the same infinitive as the negative tu command, and for the same reason: it is the form of the verb that does not have to decide who is being addressed.

Mistakes English speakers make

Non parla for don't speak. The negative tu command takes the infinitive: Non parlare. This is the big one.

Using the tu form with a stranger. Senti! to a shop assistant or an older stranger sounds overfamiliar. Senta, scusi is the correct opener. Nobody will be offended by the polite form; plenty of people will notice the informal one.

Adding the -a ending to every verb. Only -are verbs make their tu command in -a. -Ere and -ire verbs keep the -i: prendi, senti, dormi, not prenda, which is the polite Lei command.

Forgetting the double consonant. Dimi and dami are not Italian. Dimmi, dammi, fammi: the double sound is the whole point.

Putting the pronoun after the polite form. Dicami is wrong. The polite command puts the pronoun in front: Mi dica.

Assuming the imperative is always rude. English speakers soften every instruction into a question and then find Italian direct. With per favore or dai, an Italian imperative among friends is friendly, not bossy. Where you really do need to be polite, the conditional gives you potrebbe and vorrei, which are softer than any command.

What to practise

Start with the markers, senti and senta, scusa and scusi, because pairing them teaches the two registers in their smallest possible form. Then drill the negative tu command until Non parlare is the only version that sounds right. Finally, practise the pronoun pairs, dimmi against mi dica, fammi vedere against mi faccia vedere, because that contrast is where the two systems part company most clearly. The polite forms come straight from the Italian subjunctive, so if the Lei column looked familiar, that is why, and the Italian course drills all of it on real sentences.